Carney’s comments
It’s Twitter Tuesday, where we find the best from among Twitter users.
A father preparing for a family trip tweeted, “Ask kids to pack suitcases. Kids packed suitcases. Checked suitcases. Repacked kids’ suitcases again, this time with clothes.”
I like this one: “You can just call yourself an Olympic hopeful. You don’t have to fill out any paperwork.”
This funny woman I follow says, “Girls are supposed to be made of sugar and spice and nice stuff. I’m made of bagel chips and tootsie rolls and I’m mostly just annoying.”
On a related note, “Everyone talks about the child inside them, but there’s a raccoon inside me that tells me to embrace the dark circles under my eyes, sleep all day, and eat delicious garbage.”
A Twitter question asked, “What if UFOs were billionaires from another planet?”
This is what I mean when I say, “Whatever I’m doing, I can picture my father looking down on me. He’s not dead, he’s just acting very condescending.”
One last question: “Are you still hungry after eating the pasta and appetizer?”